I am now a Mac user. Thank you, God and company.
I’m now officially on food stamps. I’m one satisfied, post-grad.
What can I say, Mom? It’s been a lovely 22 years. I couldn’t ask for a better mother. You are all I need. #MothersDay
"Im wtg for tire aalinment at seears. Waste of time anyways. Dont laugh but if lu texts u if I sent you money justreply yes or forward hismsg to me before replayin. He doesnt know ihad topay car taxes with tax refund. Not that he would of gotten one without me. Before we married he always owed over three hundred. So if u were to prorate it. I should. Get more anyways. My taxes r. Over two hundred dollars. And his is like forty buck no comparison. Anyways I should ofefiled those damn state taxes but because I mailed connecticut in. Ten to twelve weeks. Holyy crap. Only goodthin today someone dropped the ir ten dollarbill and sabarro receipts. I eyeballed that from a distance. And no one hanging outside of sears. So they must of just walked by and went into parkin lot. Hello mr whoppper meal"
text from my Mom that I received while intoxicated, which I was still unable to make sense of upon becoming sober
Had I found this tucked away neatly in your rectal cavity(ies), there exists the possibility that we may not be sitting here, talking about how you and your mother don’t get along and how your sister is getting the house.
Something tells me this sausage biscuit isn’t going to be enough to take the pain away from 49 years of strife, perdition, and disenchantment.
"Once you have identified with some form of negativity, you do not want to let go, and on a deeply unconscious level, you do not want positive change. It would threaten your identity as a depressed, angry, or hard-done by person. You will then ignore, deny, or sabotage the positive in your life. This is a common phenomenon. It is also insane."
Oh, thank God for cigarettes. Why did I think trying to be healthy would positively impact my life?